The week before I came I was advised to stop working so hard and take time to prepare myself and begin to listen. And what I was told to do, was to listen for the songs, that Africa wanted to sing to me...and I wasn’t sure how to do that….How d’you listen for a song? Would  it come on the wind or play in the treetops? So I’ve tried to listen and I’ve heard many things from crying to laughing to whispering grasses...and in between I’ve heard a lament...and this is what I’ll speak of to you.

I’ve heard a lament…

I’ve heard a lament…
It’s a song for a land, polluted with suffering...
A funeral song looking back on apartheid..
Of crazy injustice...of such separation…
leaving broken up people...legacies of division...
the poorest still living in enforced separation.

The song was lamenting the blessings not flowing…
leaving people downtrodden, distracted, no vision…
A lament for the men: making children, then leaving
A song for the women: chased away from rondavels
A lament for the gogos: neglected, abandoned
A song for the broken, the homeless, the orphaned.

I heard the song weeping, for missing role-models
of daddies and chieftains, of pastors and preachers
...A song crying out for new leaders and teachers.
A song of burned grasses in Mpumalanga.

But high on the winds, I hear new songs are coming:
Care-workers are singing and weeping and working-
selflessly walking and feeding the children…
protecting the fragile...embracing the broken…
foot-washing grandpas- giving hope to the gogos..

And Black Fathers are coming to sing to the women
And Black Mothers are rising to care for their children
I see hope rising: the children are playing!
They are skipping and laughing and learning and thriving!
I see hope coming as people lose blindness:
reach out to their neighbours & stand up for justice!

I see hope coming like rain in the grasses...the parched burning grasses of Mpumalanga
For I know God as Father- One who’ll stay with his children...who will comfort the gogos...not chase away mothers
I see hope coming like rain in the grasses of Mpumalanga...dear Mpumalanga….

Ruth Clay 30/7/14

Mpumalanga
Land of burned grasses...of hornbills and cheetahs...
of sunshine just rising...Hear! A Lion is roaring
Mpumalanga you sing to our heartstrings...
Of men with no papers...of chased away women
Of children as parents...of orphans abandoned ...

And in Matlosane,
have the visions all faded?
Are the prophets all silent?
Will the people stay scattered?
Painfully wounded
neglected and hurting
Will 'fruit salad' examples
start the tide turning?


So the question is, what are you going to do with what you have seen? What counts is not a feeding programme or a grant, but someone who invests of themselves- it must cost you, you.

In the incarnation, Jesus 'moved into the neighbourhood'...he pitched his tent in our village and it changed all of us. (Thanks George.) We visit, because He visited us first.

Stepping forward
Lead us into action
Live to feed the hungry
walk beside the broken
We must go
Keep us from just singing....

Let us wake from our sleeping, new hope is rising

Oshoek day 2-washing Grandpa's feet

After a really gruelling day of visits yesterday, I felt weary and heavy-hearted as we drove again to Oshoek to visit yet more families looking after young children in desperate situations. A small group of us headed out into the community again- if you can call a scattered collection of huts with no services, resources, communication or connection a community....how do the amazing careworkers do this every day without losing hope themselves?

Rocky, Roseanne, Joe and I stopped first at MaP's. She had previously been supported by a care-worker whom she was really close to- but they had died and she had been so ill she also nearly died. She has no work or hope of work and so she has no food. This is not a case of finding something from the freezer when you can't get fresh-this is a case of having no food, meaning literally no food in the house... During the time of her illness, MaP's 4 girls just upped and left, leaving her with no support and a younger sibling to care for. These communities are just full of these desperate stories of broken families, desperate bids for a better life and a fragility of existence so easily stretched to breaking point. We sang songs and prayed with her telling her how special she was to be caring for the child and how we valued what she did against the odds. Her favourite song was 'It is well...'- so ironic and yet bringing a spark of hope in a dark place...

At the second home the Gogo and Tata ( Grandad) were sat in a very dark smoky rondavel. It was a warm but dark, dirty place where carbon from the fire literally hung in cobwebs off the ceiling. There was no electric light or water  and the  smoke from the fire was so thick we took it in turns to go outside to breathe-not surprisingly, this lovely old man has lung problems...and is on medication for a blood infection. The ageing pair find it really hard to care for a young child there and worry as Tata's legs seem to be getting worse- with the second one  starting to feel numb. There is no clinic in the community  but they access help from  a few roads away.

As they get more ill and less mobile it will become increasingly difficult to help the child get back after school, and it's a tough, scary walk back if done alone. How vulnerable the kids are here and it's so hard to help them do homework or provide food for them in such a place.
In this seemingly hopeless fragile home we shared God's love telling of Tata being held in the palms of God's hands...how God keeps our tears in a bottle and seats the poor in high places in his upside down kingdom.

We washed Tata's feet by candle light, massaging warmth, care and affection into them, blessing the couple with prayer and Scripture seeing eyes light up as Tata told of his own belief - in my eyes -against the odds. Pray for these guys...we surely have no idea how difficult it must be to hang onto such tiny threads of hope- pray that somehow the ongoing visits will keep hope alive...

Oshoek

You know one of the things about coming on a journey like this is that we all feel different things at different times. Life takes us different paths and sometimes we look and wonder- why does that touch them and not me? or why does this touch me but not them. The fruit salad team that we are brings such an amazing dynamic as people learn to be together, work together and appreciate each others strengths.

Previously we visited the communities of Share and learned of new hope, amazing careworkers, feeding programmes and lives which are starting to be transformed. It was hard but it was great to see such signs of life. This last two days however we went to a new area up near the Swaziland border. Here the poverty is literally devastating.We were invited to accompany the amazing careworkers who every day walk difficult trails to ramshackle sheds to support destitute families. Joe and I went to one such place.Surrounded by old carparts where they do occasional panel beating sat an old woman in the dirt.Gogo S greeted us laughing, trying to work out who we were with her half-blind eyes. Here there was utter destitution.  The place was filthy and the lady was sat in the dirt covered in dirt. They have no work...no food...and no papers. As Swazi refugees they have no documents and so cannot get grants or do work. Because they have no papers and the children don't have birth certificates it's hard to get into school....and there is no money for uniform without which they cannot go. If the kids do get into school they cannot metriculate - once more reinforcing the cycle of low aspiration, no qualifications, no work and no papers. We asked the Gogo if we could fetch water for her and in this very cold afternoon we wheeled wheelbarrows of dirty containers across a couple of fields to a water pump. The way was rocky and hard to negotiate and then the pump had to be worked with considerable effort to fill the dirty containers. We wheeled them back, watching kids who didn't even have wheelbarrows balance water on their heads in huge buckets...to a filthy home with no light or running water

The gogo apologised for having nothing to offer us...but they literally have nothing. I sobbed all the way back to base to see people living with nothing...less than nothing...

Fruit salad, pecan nuts and Mercy Air.

This morning we headed off to 2 different churches to worship. Then after much cake and coffee, eggy bread and fried bananas at Zannas, we decided to go on foot across to the shops, demonstrating the 'fruit salad' ( multi-cultural/racial ) team we are, to locals - who just stare to see such a mixed group. Between us we can greet people in Zulu, Tswana, Siswati, Xhosa, Sotu, Afrikaans, English....and several other languages- so it's great fun to surprise people by thanking them or greeting them in their own language. Some of us can name at least some of the African animals in Tswana now and we all join in singing - sometimes doing the same song repeatedly, but with verses in different languages.You just gotta do it!!

We then had a wander around some upmarket shops and arts places.  It seems a bit surreal to see paintings selling at 39,000ZAR when people down the road live in 1-room shacks. Again it is this massive discrepancy which is hardest to fathom and deal with.

Later we went off to the Mercy Air HQ. Paul & Cathy are doing an amazing job in so many ways. There is much to mull- there is so much potential here for bringing teams out and encouraging these guys who enable such inspiring projects to happen and keep going. The farm is beautiful and it felt in one way like a little oasis as we took photos of the tropical flowers and gathered pecan nuts.But most importantly the passion to see transformation in disadvantaged communities just shines out..what an example... to give up the comfortable for the unpredictable...

This evening back at base we are all sitting around like one big family, chatting, reading,blogging, playing, praying...what an amazing team - thanks you guys x

Kruger and heartaches

Yesterday was absolutely amazing and really hard all wrapped into one. A busload of us woke around 4.30am and headed off to Numbi gate of Kruger National Park. What an absolutely awesome place. We spent the best part of 12 hours entranced in the sunshine as cheetahs and leopards, hippos and zebra enthralled us. We managed to see 6 out of the big 7 African animals as well as so...many others. To be surrounded with such beautiful creatures in such an environment was such a privilege...Hornbills kept swooping and landing by us while impala were just everywhere.. along with marmosets and eland, bushbuck and waterbuck, buffalo and butterflies.Then out of the blue comes this female lion just padding down the road towards us...just brilliant.Such fun in the bus too. I will miss these guys we are travelling our journey with so... much when we have to leave.

After a brilliant day full of superlatives and sunshine I got back to the news that my young son back at home has fallen and been taken to hospital. I can't believe he'll spend a 3rd summer with an arm in plaster! Bless him he had such hopes for the next few weeks. But you know God is good...the guys have been so supportive here... and despite it being really hard to be away at times like this, I am so privileged to share parenting with an amazing hubby who has just taken it all in his stride and enabled me to come here. Thanks Steve. x

Sharing the frustrations...

On Friday morning we started the day at the office of the lady who supports the careworkers out in Share community. Audrey is such an inspiration- working against the odds to  help people  look after their own communities. Against the odds is suchan understatement... it would be so easy to rush in and impose solutions which would further walk all over he powerless,...but instead they build up local people, help them find faith, resource and inspire them and enable them to look after people in their own communities. The careworkers often live in similar circumstances though...and yet are so gracious...so giving...so compassionate...

I cannot get over the way that the poor can be so discarded here...left to die in the gutter...when the infrastructure is in place just down the road. How can it be that one community can live in beautiful homes with swimming pools behind high security gates and fences... and go to work in good jobs and eat balanced meals, while others are left hungry and cold at their gates...without even the barest essentials. Kids without parents, security, healthcare...without good men in their communities who can model parenting...affection...play...biblical values...without any regular source of food ...and we moan when the right programme's not on the telly or a shop doesn't sell our preferred brand.

To then be told that the chief of the village just its back and does nothing ...that orphans are bullied...that women are chased from homes with their children when their partners move on...to meet such beautiful people and know they are so powerless they cannot even reach to grab the bottom rung of the ladder...we have seen so much and yet know so little...

The resilience of some of these people who take in others' children and nurture them as their own  when they themselves have nothing...and to sit with grown men breaking their hearts that nothing is being done...

Hi everyone! Now we are up in Umpamulanga at the charity Hands at work hub. The team is amazing and we gain so much by being a mix of African and English people learning together. Rocky keeps us entertained and inspired with his praying, Elise enthusiastically joined in playing netball with the kids today and Kagiso has much wisdom to share..Father Edward touched us greatly with his observations today and Katlego is such an encouragement. There is so much goodwill here and passion to learn and grow... it's really humbling.

Today we left early and travelled a long way through beautiful scenery to Share community. The poverty is truly shocking but the Careworkers are just amazing. We walked up long trails to visit the poorest of the poor who slip through usual support mechanisms, finding themselves with nothing. It was humbling to hear of comparisons with poverty back near Klerksdorp which is bad anyway in places...but being nothing like as desperate as it is here. Some people literally have nothing. To find whole families in single room houses with no food...no work..no hope of work...but with kids who are reaching edcational milestones, receiving food and care and affection- all because of the wonderful care from these men and women of peace...these careworkers who themselves live in similar areas...is truly inspiring.

The kids in our team are an example for us all...finding themselves tired, hungry, waiting... understanding only when translations are given...and travelling for long journeys...but never complaining. To be willing to be so out of their comfort zones, so young, surely has stuff to teach us.And let me say, in between the fun, there is lots of feeling uncomfortable for all sorts of reasons...and yet these amazing boys are doing so well.

Thanks for everyone praying for the roads can be very hairy...but we are all safe and sound.

Bye for now...

Oh and for anyone who has ever drunk Amarula ( a bit like a fruit Baileys...) ....did you know it is made with the fruit of an amarula tree??!!You do now!!

African time...ants...pillow fights and onto Umpamalanga

Well that was a surreal couple of days!! Multiple changes of plans, delays, extra meetings and frustrations with vehicles that wouldn't start left us mostly chilling out at the bishop's house, cared for by the wonderful Ivy. I've decided that everyone needs an Ivy and having told her so, she offered to come back with us!!! ( Don't worry, Brenda, she's staying really! ) the hospitality has been amazing.
Richard and Rose headed up to Itsoseng, Gareth and Roseane to 'Ruth's' to be wonderfully cared for locally and me and the 3 lads - our Joe, Andrew(13) and Sam (11) pottered about, read, wrote, played games and had pillow fights!! We even took a walk around the neighbourhood. Being in a predominantly 'white' part of town, there is security everywhere, dogs, armed guards, walls, fences, fences and more walls- and noone except us wandering about!!This is in such contrast to Soweto and the townships we've been in which are vibrant and bustling places.

Later, the humbugs and lemon sherberts scattered through my luggage to find as surprises on our trip provided sustenance for what seemed like a whole tribe of ants and I spent quite a while trying to get rid of them from every corner!!( note to self: seal sweets in plastic bags!!)

Eventually our new African teammates Katlego, Kagiso, Elisa, Father Edward and Rocky arrived and we soon started to get to know each other, swapping stories and eating more wonderful food. They eat so much meat here! I mean I've eaten more in two days than I would in a week at home!

Now its wednesday evening

Today we visited the Museum of apartheid  together, leaving with much to reflect on....

We then headed East through the Highlands, past signs warning of hippos crossing, blue mountains and smoky passes, pink skies and beautiful hills.Awesome scenery. I even overcame my concerns about driving and drove from a couple of hours out of Johannesburg up to White River. We finished the journey in the dark and negotiating the final dirt track road to be welcomed by the lovely team here in Umpamalanga. We have arrived safely. Chat soon xx

Sunday in Tigane, soul-searching back at home

It was minus 2 yesterday morning when we went our separate ways to 3 different churches across the Diocese. Joe and I travelled with Bishop Steve Diseko to Tigane, to a township church where they were having a special confirmation service. We had left early, with temperature below freezing but blue skies and golden sunshine. As we travelled, we talked about South African history, industry and politics and it was humbling to be so welcomed, given the history. We drove along noting the enormous Afrikaner farms and the contrasting townships for people of colour. Although government policy has changed and there is now democracy- it's as if in practise, apartheid is still in place here, with people segregated by ethnicity into different geographical areas. While some people of colour move into more affluent areas, it's by no means 2 way traffic and the inequalities stare you in the face. But while there is massive material poverty in the black community we visited, the sense of community, welcome, hospitality & generosity is absolutely amazing... we have so much to learn about welcoming people who are different...

The service lasted well over 5 hours(!) and was full of 4 part harmonies, dancing, incense, children, celebration, more incense and more harmonies. Talk about surround sound...it was amazing and would have been overwhelming but for the amazing welcome...After negotiations about the distribution of blankets- it is very cold at night here- we then got spontaneously invited with Bishop Steve and Brenda to someone's home where we ate a wonderful feast. Sorghum porridge was the 'soulfood' on offer along with meats, salads, vegetables, pasta, rice and so much more.

After a braai back at home later, the 4 boys (Leruo, Sam, Andrew and Joe) played pillow fights, wrote journals and chilled out and we had the real privilege of sharing with Father Daniel (the Dean), Flora-mma, Bishop Steve and Brenda. We laughed and shared stories, asked questions and shared sorrow at terrible situations...Who are we that we should be allowed 'in' to what it feels like to be here at such a time as this? It feels like post-apartheid there is potential for such enormous changes in this land where there still needs to be so much more justice and reconciliation...and yet there are so many challenges. It felt like such a privilege to sit with these warm, godly, compassionate people and ask together what God is saying at this time and what part can churches play in meeting the enormous needs that are here.

Monday

After a much longer night's sleep in our jumpers and socks we've had a quiet morning because neither vehicle will work and the plans have all changed...write soon...



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Africa day 1

After a long journey, flying over about 14 countries, we arrived safely in Johannesburg early this morning- an unlikely little group- Richard & Rose, Sam and Andrew, Gareth, Roseanne, Joe and I. Unlike the seething masses of people we found waiting at airports in Asia, this was much more orderly(!) and we quickly found our way through and out to collect our borrowed cars. Joe's highlight was being high-fived by the toilet attendant who welcomed visitors to his office!! It's mid-winter here -quite cold but with glorious sunshine. After brief stops including for a light lunch at Mugg and Bean we headed out to Klerksdorp. We talked much of the townships and way Africa was divided up under Colonial rule and then passed mile after mile of townships -sobering already to see so much material poverty. The scenery's amazing and full of contrasts from beautiful new houses with pools to - endless dry fields of gold and brown with the roadsides burned off in order to manage the land. We are guests today of Bishop Steve & Brenda Diseko & family who have made us wonderfully welcome and fed us a kind of African spaghetti bolognese and fresh out-the-oven scones and jam! Ah the joys! ( Oops yes-for those who know me well,  this won't all be about the food!!) It's amazing to be welcomed like family and then meet other friends and drink tea when they've never even met us before. Gareth and Roseanne have gone to stay elsewhere tonight and then tomorrow we part 3 ways for day 2 of our African journey. Chat soon xx

So 2 days to go now and South Africa looms large. I keep being told of all the terrible things that can happen (!) Funny how people forget that bad stuff happens everywhere but there's also wonderful people, beauty and opportunities everywhere too. And God? Well he 'gets' everywhere too - wherever there's the good the bad and the ugly and all the awesome stuff. He is Immanuel God with us in it all.

The English mozzies have made a feast of me again overnight! Let's hope their cousins leave me alone!

Looking forward to meeting Bishop Steve and his wife and the African guys who will join us in Jo'burg, making our team up to 13 who will travel North together after a few days more locally in Matlosane.

So...2 weeks to go now. Commissioning service yesterday in Essington along with the other 2 groups going out over the Summer. Really special- thanks to all involved. It's starting to feel real all of a sudden. Still got to pick up the malaria tablets, insect bite cream and plasters...feel a theme coming on! This year I've been feasted on by Black Country mozzies- let's hope they don't tell their African cousins about me!!Thought for the day...why did God create mosquitoes?!

Pondering next month's trip

It's 23rd June in sunny Aldridge and I'm pondering events coming up in July. It seems that all of this year has been leading to this. There have been so many instances when I've been prompted to listen...to wait...watch...and be 'fully there' when engaging with people...A growing understanding that we cannot always do and do not always have the words to say...but we can walk with...pay attention to and listen...and let the stories we hear begin to impact our own...